Lessons From Movies

1. Only in the UK could there every be a show this gritty and absolutely wonderful
2. Michelle and Tony are dating. But Tony always cheats on Michelle. Tony’s best friend Sid loves Michelle. But Michelle’s friend Cassie loves Sid. 
3. Cassie is one of the weirdest characters to ever exist. She is anorexic, a drug addict, a drug dealer…. and so on. 
4. Maxxie is the most beautiful boy to walk this planet. Too bad he’s gay.
5. Chris is the craziest person to live, and is in love with their psychology teacher who looks like Katy Perry… that ends up sleeping with him. I’m pretty sure that’s illegal.
6. Anwar from Skins is the guy from Slumdog Millionaire. weird. 
7. You would never expect it considering how much of a dump Chris is, but him and Jal are perfect for each other.
8. I will never send my kids to school in Bristol, UK 
9. Never have I watched a TV show based on the lives of Teenagers that feels as realistic as it does.

1. Eliza Doolittle pre Professor Harrison has the most annoying voice ever. I didn’t realize it when I was younger, but when I watched this the other day… can’t believe I’m saying it but I wanted to punch Audrey Hepburn. and who ever wants to punch Audrey Hepburn?? 
2. If you speak properly and are rich you can eat lots of chocolate. and have lots of coal to heat, have warm hands and feet. and it is lovely.  
3. Eliza could have danced all night. 
4. If you wanna teach a girl how to speak properly.. don’t use marbles. She might swallow them. ew
5. Eliza is a good girl, she is. 
6. The Rain in Spain falls mainly in the plain. 
7. A Woman cannot be more like a man.
8. Eliza and Professor Higgins have a weird father daughter/ more than that kind of relationship that will always creep me out a little.
9. To some extent, I wish I spoke poorly and was a flower girl in Covent Garden cause then I’d get all of the amazing clothes that Eliza gets to wear in this film. and dance with a Prince. and eat lots of chocolate.. heh

1. Apparently striving to be employee of the month in a huge store like Costco/Walmart is pretty competitive shit. Especially when there’s a new cashier that looks like Jessica Simpson
2. It is actually a skill to be able to do tricks while scanning/putting away someones groceries. I mean it may not be a valuable skill but its still a skill.
3. “Gold Stars” have to be delivered by a tube to the security officer and only he can stick them on the Employee of the Month tracker board. INTENSE SHIT RIGHT THUR. its worse than kindergarden
4. When girls that look like Jessica Simpson end up being Cashiers…. they obviously have a flaw. AKA Dumbo the elephant sized ears
5. When choosing a guy to be the in store optician, make sure he is pretty much 100% blind. it makes things that much more fun. especially when you’re trying to do a badass team walk and he starts walking in the wrong direction
6. Vince loves anal. 

1. Some creepy girl stalks the lives of a group of kids who live on the upper east side, and has the spare time to update a website, send out mass texts AND hide her identity from the rest of NYC. I mean… I don’t know but… that’s pretty fucking creepy
2. Everyone just has sex with everyone. This show is a huge orgy. It already got pretty awry when Serena and Dan were dating…. whilst Lily and Rufus were dating too. and I mean Serena has had sex with both Dan and Nate. and so has Vanessa. But Vanessa’s also had sex with Chuck. And so has Little J. But then Blair’s had sex with Nate and Chuck, and Chuck’s Uncle. basically, huge orgy.
3. Lily has been married to everyone. enough said.
4. Dorota is probably the best character on the show. 
5. Despite how dramatic and ridiculous this show is, one major reason I still watch it is because of the clothes. I mean SERIOUSLY. I want every single piece of clothing, handbags, shoes and accessory featured in this television show. Whoever styles the show is a God.
6. I hate. Jenny Humphrey. and Georgina Sparks. Dumb bitches screwing up people’s lives. 

1. If you and your wife are having some marital problems and having no sex what so ever, PLEASE do not fantasize about your daughter’s hot friend. especially with roses.
2. However, even if you are attracted and jack off to your daughter’s hot friend…. do stay in shape. Life is better when you stay in shape. Your wife may even still want to do you.
3. Teenage Girls, please refrain from dating boys who live next door to you and video you without your consent.
4. If your Dad assumes that you’re gay and you’re not, tell him that you suck cock for money, earn 2000 every single time and that you are the best piece of ass in 3 States. obviously won’t piss him off, instead, it’ll make him realize it’s okay to be gay and then try and hook up with the man who he thought he saw you suck off. 
5. To piss your wife off, do everything she doesn’t want you to do. Get fired, then buy a thunderbird, then almost spill beer on a 3000 Italian silk upholstered couch. It will be sure to turn her to have an affair with “The King” of realty, who just so happens to be Sandy Cohen from The OC. Weird. Weird. IT’S ONLY MEANT TO BE SANDY AND KIRSTEN!
6. Another one for you teenage girls, if you think your best friend’s dad is hot, DO NOT hook up with them. you stupid little sluts.
7. All in all… don’t buy weed from your daughter’s boyfriend, don’t be infatuated with your daughter’s best friend… and don’t piss off your wife. you might end up dead.

(Despite how sarcastic I’m being I actually thought this movie was fantastic. Watch it if you haven’t already, it’s pretty old).